Kingston

September 2nd, 2010
So frustrated and tired today. Kingston has been on a rate of 35 the last couple days. (That means the machine gives him 35 breaths a minute) He was on 30 and they tried to ween him to 28 but he didn't like that and now he's up to 35. Sometimes he doesn't breathe at all on his own and just rides the vent, letting it breathe for him. They have tried to give him Arbutirol (some little mini inhaler looking thing) - first when he needed it, and then every 3 hrs but i don't know if it's really helping. He still has A's and B's and desats and had a grade 4 this morning. His lungs sounded crackly this morning and his xrays are not improving. Jackie heard a murmur so his PDA is open and I hope it's not getting bigger. They might do another echo to check it. I'm feeling so discouraged. I'm trying to be patient and give him time to improve but he just seems to be doing worse or the same instead of better. The last couple nights we've gone up there his little roommate's parents have got to hold her. (she is also 33 wks) It's hard to watch because we just sit there and he hasn't been stable enough to hold. It makes me really sad and jealous. I wish I could do something for him. All I can do is pray, trust in God, and be patient. I knew being a mom would be challenging but i wasn't prepared for this at all.